John K. Probst
I’ve stayed much too late at the faire (36)
I’ve stayed too late, so very, very late,
Oh! I’ve stayed much too late at the faire!
I remember a time when the lights were ablaze,
And we played and we played, in the penny arcade.
And with friends and lovers always at my side,
We observed the exhibitions, and rode all the rides.
And with laughter and frivolity our ever reactions,
We took in all the fair midway exhibits and attractions.
Always enjoying the days bountiful care free play,
We feasted on cotton candy and drank pink lemonade.
But those days were another place, another time, and I was
Young, I was innocent, and in my prime. And lasting
Relationships were not my pace, and so not to take place.
And now I sit on a bench alone at the end of the pier,
Watching the setting sun slowly disappear, into a still water
Grave of the horizon’s gray colored veneer.
Chiding myself for not being in my youth, more honest, with
Others, and careless with truth, and being immature with
Regards to my relationship longevities, I always cast my lot
In personal relations curt brevity.
But those, then were my mistakes, my foolish decisions,
And one’s fate, (especially at this late date) does not allow
One to make, in realizing one’s mistakes, new revisions.
So am left at my bench to view programs of the day, blown in the wind, discarded, and it is then that I remember scenes of a midway, where friends, lovers, and I daily met and departed.
(Those memories are far better, than to continue within my gloom, or return to my one bulb light room, alone in my desolance, alone in my loneliness…alone…alone…self entombed!)
Yes, realizing, at this time and at this date, I’ve stayed so late,
So very, very late, with only memories of better times i must now bear, for I never took the time for personal relations care, and so now I’m alone and have no one with whom my memories to share.
Yes i’ve stayed very late! Yes i’ve stayed oh so late!
Yes, i’ve stayed much too late at the faire!
In 2005, John K. Probst retired from Feather River College in Quincy, California, after twenty five years of teaching humanities classes and directing plays and musicals. For more information about his life and work, visit his website: The World of John K. Probst
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Here is today’s prompt
(optional as always)
The speaker of today’s poem thinks or feels that he has in a sense outlived himself, having neglected relationships in his youth, so that now, in old age, he feels alone. Write a poem about the increasing sense of isolation and loneliness that often accompanies aging, particularly among older people with HIV/AIDS who have lost so many friends since the epidemic began in 1981.