Emanuel Xavier
Walking with Angels
—for Lindsay
AIDS
knows the condom wrapped penetration
of strangers and lovers, deep inside
only a tear away from risk
knows bare minimum t-cell level counts,
replacing intoxicating cocktails
with jagged little pills
knows how to avoid a cure thanks to war
how to keep pharmaceutical corporations
and doctors in business
AIDS
knows the weight loss desired by supermodels,
knows the fearless meaning
of a friends genuine kiss or hug
converts non-believers to religion and spirituality
comprehends loneliness
values the support of luminaries
smiles at the solidarity of single red ribbons
knows to dim the lights to elude detection
how to shame someone into hiding
from the rest of the world
to be grateful for the gift of clothing and shelter,
to remain silent,
holding back the anger and frustration
AIDS
knows that time on earth is limited for all of us
that using lemons to make lemonade is better than drinking the
Kool-Aid
but no matter how much you drink
you are always left dehydrated
knows working extensive hours
to pay hospital bills, the choice of survival
or taking pleasure in what is left of life
knows the solid white walls
you want to crash through and tear down
the thoughts of suicide in the back of your head
AIDS
knows the prosperous could be doing more
with their wealth
and that everyone still thinks it is a deserving fate—
for gays, drug addicts, prostitutes,
and the unfortunate children of such
born into a merciless world
of posh handbags and designer jewelry
knows how to be used as another percentage
to profit politicians
knows it doesn’t only affect humans but animals too, without bias —providing fodder for art
and something to be left behind
if there is a God
he has disregarded our prayers
left his angels behind to journey along with us
—none of us knowing exactly where we are headed
Emanuel Xavier, an LGBT History Month Icon, is author of the poetry collections Radiance (Rebel Satori Press, 2016), Nefarious (QueerMojo, 2013), Americano: Growing up Gay and Latino in the USA (QueerMojo, 2013), Pier Queen (QueerMojo, 2012), If Jesus Were Gay & other poems (QueerMojo, 2010), and the novel Christ Like (QueerMojo, 2009). He also edited Mariposas: A Modern Anthology of Queer Latino Poetry (Floricanto Press, 2008), Me No Habla with Acento: Contemporary Latino Poetry (Rebel Satori Press, 2011), and Bullets & Butterflies: Queer Spoken Word Poetry (Suspect Thoughts Press, 2005).
SUBMIT to Na(HIV)PoWriMo via our SUBMITTABLE site.
If you want to support the mission and work of HIV Here & Now, consider making a tax-deductible contribution to Indolent Arts Foundation, a 501(c)(3) charity.
Join our mailing list to receive news, updates, and special offers from Indolent Books, the publisher of HIV Here & Now.
Here is today’s prompt
(optional as always)
Today’s poem personifies HIV by making AIDS the subject of verbs associated with human activity: knows, comprehends, values, smiles. Write a poem that personifies HIV. Try imagining what HIV things, feels, believes, and does. Where does HIV eat, drink, sleep, go to the bathroom, work, play? What does HIV wear? What is HIV’s favorite color, movie, song, cocktail? And so on. Let your imagination run wild (see how we just personified imagination there?).