Maeve Schumacher
To Be 20 in 2020
When I’m 20 in 2020, I fill a weird and awkward space.
“I feel for you” “I understand” “It’d be so hard to be young right now”
But everyone can recognize I don’t know where I’m going or how.
So I scowl.
What else am I supposed to do?
I’ll just keep trudging through
Because I’m 20 in 2020.
When I’m 20 in 2020, I’m pushed to patience by life’s pace.
World falling apart. Building, breaking, beautiful coming together.
A paradox—long days, short months—and I reminisce on better.
So I sit outside. Enjoy the weather.
What else am I supposed to do?
No one has a clue
Because I’m 20 in 2020.
When I’m 20 in 2020, everyone’s losing the race.
“Best years of your life” “Wish I could go back” “You’re going to have so much fun!”
Interviews, internships, too-early intentions. My own expectations. I’m numb.
So I go on a run.
What else am I supposed to do?
Need to get out of my own head, too
Because I’m 20 in 2020.
When I’m 20 in 2020, it’s in the subtle I find grace.
Old friends around, I’m down, I’m sound, I might be kind-of okay.
A blessing here—more than you’d think—and I get through the day.
So I pray.
What else am I supposed to do?
Lean into what’s true
Because I’m 20 in 2020.
—Submitted on 07/17/2020
Maeve Schumacher is a rising junior at Villanova University, where she studies cognitive and behavioral neuroscience and organizational communication. Schumacher was born and raised in the northwest suburbs of Chicago.
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